


Snowball Effect

by maddogkyouchan



Series: HQ Rarepair Week 2020 [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Established Relationship, Fake/Pretend Relationship, HQ Rarepair Week, M/M, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-02-23 13:46:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,707
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23879032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maddogkyouchan/pseuds/maddogkyouchan
Summary: Kuroo gets dragged into a fun and exciting lie to help one Tsukishima Kei- it's unfortunate that Kenma gets pulled in as well.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei
Series: HQ Rarepair Week 2020 [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1720978
Comments: 5
Kudos: 89





	Snowball Effect

Tsukishima Kei is dating Kuroo Tetsurou. Kenma learns this late in the evening, when he’s getting ready to sleep, and his phone goes off over and over again as Shouyou texts him frantically. Apparently, Tsukki spilled it at the end of practice- something their second years said set him off and he snapped at them, revealing his secret relationship, of which he denied to speak any more of.

Kenma sprawls himself over his boyfriend’s lap on the bed as he responds to the texts, ignoring his groan. “Kuro, why didn’t you tell me you were dating someone else?”

He didn’t believe it from the start, but Kuroo’s genuine confusion when he answers confirms it. “Because I’m not? What are you talking about?”

“Shouyou says Tsukki told him that he’s dating you,” he says, voice flat to make Kuroo sweat a little. Kuroo immediately knows what he’s up to, of course, but it still gets him nervous.

“I don’t know why-” Kuroo’s phone starts going off as well, and Kenma raises an eyebrow at him. Kuroo slowly picks it up and starts looking through his texts. The nervousness melts away and he snorts at his phone. “Sa’a’mura is mad at me about it, too. ‘Keep your hands off my first year’- what, is he jealous?” Before Kenma can warn him not to, he’s already responding.

Kenma sighs and sits up to look at Kuroo’s phone, reading his response. “You know that just sounds like confirmation,” he tells him, before texting off a request to Shouyou.

“…ah, shit,” Kuroo realizes as his phone buzzes a dozen times in quick succession.

“Don’t answer him,” Kenma says as he gets what he needs from his friend. He holds his phone up to Kuroo’s face. “Tsukki’s number. Find out what’s going on from him first.”

Kuroo’s face lights up. “Oh, I’ve been trying to get that for ages! How’d you get it?”

“I asked Shouyou,” he says slowly, as though it’s obvious- which it really should be.

Kenma stays leaning into his side and watches as Kuroo save the number and text Tsukki.

_To: Tsukki_

_hey tsukki!!! heard from ur captain that were dating now_

There’s a few minutes of Kuroo huffing and pouting before Tsukki responds. He can really be so childish when they’re alone.

_From: Tsukki_

_How did you get this number?_

_To: Tsukki_

_ur teams shorty gave it to Kenma_

_so anyway wanna spill the deets_

_From: Tsukki_

_I should have known._

_To: Tsukki_

_thats not answering the quessstion_

_From: Tsukki_

_You didn’t ask a question._

_To: Tsukki_

_ok ok_

_why did you tell ur team were dating_

_From: Tsukki_

_It was a lie of necessity, and I apologize._

_Don’t tell them._

_I’ll just tell them it’s over in a day or two._

“Push him,” Kenma advises. He’s curious about what could drive Tsukki to lie about something like that.

“Already on it.”

_To: Tsukki_

_awww cmon thats not an answer_

_hows it a lie of necesity_

_From: Tsukki_

_Your texting is disgusting._

_Tanaka-san and Nishinoya-san were badgering me about why I didn’t have a crush on our manager. Apparently my deflecting read as me being in a relationship. I didn’t want to go back to square one, so when they kept pushing me, I said the first name that came to mind._

_To: Tsukki_

_and that was me?? thats sweet_

_From: Tsukki_

_The first name that came to mind that wouldn’t come to light as a lie immediately._

_Except that Hinata told Kozume-san._

_To: Tsukki_

_u shoulda known he would_

_From: Tsukki_

_My mistake._

_Will you keep it a secret?_

“Whatcha think?” he asks Kenma.

He rests his head on Kuroo’s shoulder. “I don’t mind, and you’ll find it funny.”

“Can I play along?”

…yeah, he knew this was coming. “Alright. Don’t get killed by their captain.”

_To: Tsukki_

_lmao ill do you one better_

_From: Tsukki_

_I don’t know what you’re saying, but it’s probably a bad idea._

_To: Tsukki_

_ill come break up w u in person_

_From: Tsukki_

_You’re not doing that._

_To: Tsukki_

_itll b fun!! you guys do weekend practice right?? ill come by tmrw_

_From: Tsukki_

_I can’t emphasize enough how much you’re not doing that._

Kuroo doesn’t answer that text, or the ones that follow it. “Hey, Kenma, wanna-”

“I’m coming with,” he cuts him off. “I want to see Shouyou.”

“Oh, okay,” Kuroo laughs, tossing his phone aside. “Not to support your boyfriend breaking up with his secret side piece, but to hang out with other guys. Yeah, I totally get it.”

“Good.” He drags Kuroo to lie down. “Don’t expect me to be jealous of your fake boyfriend.”

“Oh, shit, but can you fake it? Like- we can pretend I was cheating on you with Tsukki, and then-”

“No.” He shuts him down immediately. “Do you really want their whole team to think you’re that kind of person?” After a pause, Kuroo shakes his head, sheepish from not having thought that part through. “You should pull him aside and break up with him where they can see but not hear it.”

Kuroo wraps his arms around Kenma, pulling him in closer. “Aw, that’s boring!”

“It won’t get you murdered. By Tsukki or Sawamura-kun.”

Kuroo grumbles, but falls asleep without arguing anymore, which Kenma’s grateful for, though he knows that it probably won’t be so easy in person.

In the morning, they tell Kuroo’s mother that they’ll be gone for the day, and then head out to catch an early train. Kenma takes his hand and stands between him and any strangers who come too close. As extroverted as Kuroo seems, he’s really just a very socially skilled introvert- though not a lot of people know that. Kenma, as his childhood friend, knew it first, and has grown up filtering it into his every action, until he doesn’t have to think of it at all, automatically sheltering Kuroo when it’s needed.

For once, though, it actually gains his attention, though he’s not sure why. Kuroo hates taking the train alone, so Kenma knew the second he said he would go to Miyagi that Kenma would have to go with him. He’s not sure why this obvious thought is taking up his attention, until a companion sentence crawls into his mind- would Tsukki do the same for Kuroo?

Kenma knows Tsukki on the court. He’s seen him develop as a player, both on his own and in how he works with his team. Off the court, he mostly knows what Kuroo or Shouyou have told him. Shouyou only thinks he’s mean, complaining about how Tsukki won’t tutor him or what mean thing he said at lunch, but he still spends time with him. Kuroo thinks he’s fun to tease, and enjoys his company.

But Kenma… doesn’t have an opinion on him. They’ve never really talked. From what he knows of him, he wouldn’t think he would be the kind of person to make up a story about dating someone- especially a man- he can’t stand just to avoid a conversation about a girl, but… apparently, he is. It makes Kenma curious. What kind of person is Tsukishima Kei?

“What’s that intense look for?” Kuroo asks.

“…just thinking.” He squeezes Kuroo’s hand and doesn’t elaborate.

It’s only this dating lie that’s brought this question to his mind, which would imply… something, he’s sure. Jealousy, maybe, or a need to be comforted, that Tsukki isn’t good enough for Kuroo, and Kuroo is only his. Yet, he feels fine. No possessiveness or nasty feelings towards Tsukki. Only curiosity. An itch he wants to scratch by sitting Tsukki down and questioning him until he knows why Tsukki lied in the first place- and why he chose Kuroo for it.

He doesn’t get the opportunity- at least, not yet. Instead, he and Kuroo get off the train at the stop nearest Karasuno, and get lost. By the time they get guided to the school, practice is just letting out- good for the plan, less so for how they wanted to see how the team has been doing since their last practice together.

As soon as they spot Tsukki, he spots them right back. To his credit, there isn’t even a stutter in his step as he changes directories, brushing off his freckled friend and heading right to them. There’s a burst of chatter from the rest of the team- Shouyou yelling his name in delight, Sawamura-kun shouting at Kuroo- but that can wait until after.

“Kuroo-san,” Tsukki says, voice dripping with honey. Kuroo actually shudders at his tone. “I thought I told you not to come?”

“Yeah, but I had to talk to you!” Kuroo says, getting right into the role. “It’s pretty important, I had to say it in person.”

“I don’t think this is the time or place,” Tsukki responds swiftly. He glances at Kenma, who’s, of course, staring right back at him. Tsukki hates this happening in front of the team, of course, it’s clear to read, and Kenma should pull them both aside, but Kuroo’s already ruined it.

“Too important. I want to break up.”

Tsukki closes his eyes and takes a sharp breath as yelling starts back up from his team. “That _damn cat_ was messing with our Tsukishima?!” Yamamoto’s twin- Ryuunosuke, he knows- yells, and starts to roll up the sleeves of his jersey.

“Huh?! Why is Kuroo-san breaking up with him? Did he realize that Tsukishima’s the worst?” Shouyou asks too loudly, and Kenma could wince as Tsukki’s expression darkens. As comments continue- some with pity and some agreeing with Shouyou’s sentiments, he swears he can see a touch of hurt in there, too.

But Tsukki goes on, playing his part despite the chaos behind him. “And why is that, Kuroo-san?”

“Uh, well…” And Kuroo is forced to improvise, which he does in possibly the worst way. He drapes an arm around Kenma. “Because I have a thing for Kenma.”

_Why was he just brought into this._

Tsukki seems to have similar sentiments, from how he looks even angrier. “Oh?” His voice is still as even, though, and he seems to think fast, because his anger fades, leaving a vapid smile in its place. “I don’t see why that’s a problem, Kuroo-san.”

“…huh?” It throws Kuroo completely off his rhythm. “Wait, what do you-”

“If the only problem is that you like someone else, well, I don’t think we ever discussed exclusivity before. And I can understand, with the distance between Miyagi and Tokyo, that you could feel… neglected,” Tsukki continues, still with that damn smile. “You could have just asked to date him too, before jumping straight to breaking up.”

Kuroo scrambles to put things back on track, while Kenma is just… lost. Why is Tsukki continuing this charade when the whole point was for them to break up? “Well, uh- isn’t that weird?”

“Ask that again to Sawamura-san. After all, he’s seeing Sugawara-san and Azumane-san.”

“Wait, what?” Kuroo looks past Tsukki at Sawamura-kun, and cups his hands around his mouth as he shouts to him. “Sa’a’mura, you have two boyfriends?”

Asahi-san has to wrap his arms around Sawamura-kun’s waist and hold him back.

“He does,” Tsukki answers for him. “The three of them have been dating for months.”

“Wait- all three? So you wanna date Kenma too?!” Kuroo blurts out, as if he’s forgotten this is all an act.

Tsukki’s eyes go to Kenma, and Kenma swears- he can almost tell how desperately Tsukki is pleading him to play along. “I don’t see why not.”

“Don’t do it, Kenma!” Shouyou yells, but Kenma is already nodding. They can situate this in private, but for now, in front of the crowd, he’s going to help Tsukki… save face, or whatever it is he’s trying to accomplish with steering things in this direction.

Some of the tension leaves Tsukki’s body. “Now that that’s sorted, let’s go. I’m sick of the peanut gallery.”

He did want to talk to Shouyou- but it can wait in favor of deal with this. Kenma nods, and grabs them both by the wrists, leading a stunned Kuroo and an uncomfortable Tsukki away from the school. He doesn’t know where he’s going, but what really matters is being away from the rest of the Karasuno team.

It’s a few roads away when Kenma slows, releasing Tsukki’s wrist. “What was that?” It’s what he was about to ask, but instead, it’s coming out of Tsukki’s mouth, aimed at Kuroo.

“What was _that?_ ” Kuroo echoes. “We were supposed to be breaking up, not making a- a three-way relationship or whatever!”

“You were breaking up with me _for_ someone- were you trying to make me look pathetic?” Tsukki hisses at him. “This is why I didn’t want you to come- I could handle it on my own just fine. I could have kept it simple, told them it was mutually decided, maybe because you have to focus on getting ready for university, or _something_ \- instead, you decided to turn it into you dumping me?”

“I thought it’d be more dramatic!”

“I didn’t want it to be dramatic!” He takes off his glasses, rubbing at the bridge of his nose. “I just- I was trying to handle this without you. Couldn’t you have just listened?”

Kuroo opens his mouth to argue more, and Kenma elbows him in the side to keep him distracted long enough for Kenma to speak instead. “Sorry, Tsukki,” Kenma says over Kuroo’s wheezing. “Kuro didn’t think things through. But you’re lucky. He wanted to pretend he was cheating on me with you.”

Tsukki’s face twists up in disgust as he slides his glasses back on. “You wanted to make me into the other man?”

“It’d be like something out of TV,” he tries to defend himself, but Tsukki’s glare cuts him off.

“Awful. I wish I had said Kozume-san in the first place.”

“Oh, come on, Tsukki-”

“Don’t call me that,” Tsukki cuts him off.

Kuroo waves his hands around, indignant. “You didn’t tell Kenma not to call you Tsukki!”

“It’s less annoying when it comes from Kozume-san.”

“You can just call me Kenma,” he offers.

Tsukki glances back at him, but doesn’t answer either way. Instead, after an awkward pause, he goes on. “I can still sort this out. In a week or so, I’ll tell them the three of us didn’t work out. It’ll still be… uncomfortable, but easier to explain.”

“…so I helped by bringing Kenma into it,” Kuroo tries to say.

“No. You made it worse, but let me salvage it when you said that I could… date… him too.” Tsukki sounds almost pained.

“Hey, don’t make it sound like a bad thing. Kenma’s great to date!” Kuroo takes his hand and pulls him close.

Surprise, with a tinge of something that Kenma doesn’t quite recognize, flashes across Tsukki’s face. “Oh. Are you two actually dating?”

“Oh, uh…” Kuroo laughs, a little awkwardly. “Yeah. For a while, actually.”

“…I see.”

Kenma waits for more, but Tsukishima doesn’t seem up to adding to it. When the silence starts to drag on, Kuroo speaks up. “Well… you just finished practice, you gotta be pretty hungry, right?”

“Not really. I don’t have the most voracious appetite.”

“Right, I remember that from the training camp… you and Kenma both don’t eat enough,” Kuroo complains, and Kenma sighs. “Listen, I owe you- there’s gotta be somewhere good to eat around here, right? Lead the way and I’ll buy you food as an apology.”

“Which means you’re hungry and need me to guide you,” Tsukki translates. “Fine. But since you _owe_ me, I pick the place.”

“…fine… but not somewhere that’ll break my wallet, alright? I can’t afford to take you _and_ Kenma on a fancy date with no notice.”

“No promises.”

Before Tsukki can turn away and lead them to the place he has in mind- a bakery, not too expensive, where he orders a slice of strawberry shortcake and devours it with a pleased expression that Kenma and Kuroo share a surprised look when they see- Kenma watches a light blush cross his face at Kuroo calling it a date.

He gets the feeling that this week could be the start of something really troublesome.

**Author's Note:**

> day one of Haikyuu rarepair week, using only the prompt fake dating au. theres a chance this might get a continuation after im finished writing the rest of the week
> 
> you can find me on twitter at deltonysus and on tumblr at trantsukki


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